Blogging as it relates to life

I have a confession to make.  My name is Natalie, and I behave in a negligent manner towards a loved one.  I’m thoughtless and am unkind without remorse.  I demand that this person meet unattainable goals.  I wrongfully believe that this person can meet all the needs without requiring anything.  I tend to put this person down and tell her that she couldn’t possibly be successful at this, that or the other…

I am being mean to me.

Isn’t that just sad?!  Actually, it just makes me mad!  See the issue?  Who am I mad at?  Self-love is not my default…and I would even say self-like may be pushing the envelope.  How does this relate to blogging, this blog…you may ask?  Well, I just spent about thirty minutes rereading old blog posts and enjoying seeing what I’ve been up to since I started up this little project back in August 2012.  I love watching Holden (and us as parents) grow up over time.  I have felt a little sad that I discontinued it over the past few months.  I’ve also felt extremely overwhelmed and like I have no time for anything besides the basics.  Now, this feeling is partially just my personality, but I think I could make a pretty good list of why this feeling is valid (new baby, full-time work, busy family life, daycare craziness, average ups-and-downs of life, etc.).  I’ve pushed aside this outlet to make time and focus on other things.  Important things like feeding humans I love, talking to my extended family on the phone, paying attention to my curious and talkative 5 year old, carrying around a sweet baby who is very partial to her mama, and just general life stuff like tidying up tons of blocks and clean clothes that are piled on the sofa.

The thing is…I’m not sure what to do about it.  I keep telling myself that this is just a season of life!  I’ll have more time for me (hobbies, interests, friends, etc.)when <insert milestone life event here>.  Will I really though?  Will I have a good, long life to explore all the possibilities?  Am I being selfish?  unreasonable?

Things I do know:

  1. I love my children.
  2. I desperately want to follow God’s plan for my life {even though I must be too dense to get the picture sometimes!}.
  3. I am not bionic despite my sister’s ideas.

To conclude this rambling blog post, I’m unsure if I will continue to write in this Internet space.  And I guess it should be enough reason for me to keep doing it if I ENJOY IT (not considering how many “likes” or “hits” it gets.  HOWEVER, I just can’t bear to completely shut it down.  So Happy Friday!  Good grief, that was some heavy thinking!

Natalie

3 thoughts on “Blogging as it relates to life

  1. I do enjoy your blogs and learning more about you through your blogs. Wish we could have time during school hours to hang or talk; who knows; maybe our schedules will miraculously align. You take time to do what makes you happy. Blogging I am sure allows you to express yourself and feelings as does performing music and playing my flute relieves stress. I can’t imagine how working moms juggle it all since I am not a mom. I do not sacrifices are made but you should take time for YOU and allow your creativity and plans to be a priority once in awhile.

  2. Okay so some typos in last comment but hope you get what I meant. LOL me+ music + flute = happiness and creativity and is a hobby that I don’t always take time for MY own pleasure. Blogging to you allows one way for you Natalie to express yourself and get ideas and support from other working moms and fellow Christians. Peace and Love Nat

When words are both true and kind, they can change the world.Buddha Please comment below.

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